


Cookie Dust

by Bitch_McNuggetz



Series: The Brainswap!AU [1]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Brainswap!AU, F/F, There are no relationships, and now it won't remove it for some reason, but I accidentally clicked one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-25 00:35:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13822755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bitch_McNuggetz/pseuds/Bitch_McNuggetz
Summary: In a world where people have the ability to switch consciousnesses(or rather literally, brains) one girl has amazing aspirations to achieved her most high reaching goals in just a single move...





	1. Chapter 1

    It was the perfect crime… Just swap brains, get the job done, and carry right back on with the day… nothing could possibly go wrong…

    Ruby Rose was about to pull off the greatest Cookie haul of her life…

    “Step one,” She recited to her eager, yet ultimately not understanding, pup, “We get Weiss alone somehow… maybe catch her unawares or ask her for help with something.” Ruby paced back and forth in front of the whiteboard where the plan was written out in full. Zwei watched her pace back and forth with his adorable pupperino eyes. “Then BAM! We knock her out cold…”

    "Step two,“ she continued, “once we have her brain. We get to the CCT tower and make a simple phone call to the Schnee Dust Company. And, as we are now the heiress to the company, we make a very special order…”

    Ruby pulled out a diorama of a cookie and a brown and black spotted Dust crystal and slammed it down on the table in her dorm. “FOR PRODUCTION TO BEGIN ON COOKIE DUST, SO THAT I CAN FIRE DELICIOUS GOOEY CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES INTO MY MOUTH WHENEVER I WANT!” She sat back lost in her brown sugar flavored fantasies, “And it will be great for battlefield morale…”

    “Arf!” was Zwei’s only response.

    Ruby smiled at him, “Exactly,” she sat up, “and after we have set the gears in motion, we just put our bodies back together right, and wait for the fruits of our labor to come straight to our front door!” Ruby was maniacally rubbing her hands together at this point, "Now how to get it done..?"

    Weiss Schnee sat peacefully beneath a tree. She was reading a book and humming a little tune.

    "Alright Zwei, get ready," Ruby whispered to her corgi as she perched in the tree above Weiss, "this procedure is gonna be very delicate, so we have to make sure it goes perf-" Ruby was interrupted by an apple falling right in front of her. It landed directly on Weiss' head, knocking her out in seconds. "Or that works," Ruby said casually as she descended upon Weiss' unconscious body. "Alright, boy, I'm trusting you to make sure this goes right. Once I've opened up our heads, I need you to switch the pink things inside, understand?"

     Zwei barked

    "Great! Now let's do this!" Ruby opened up Weiss' scalp in a very cartoon-ish twist off sort of way, and removed the top of her own head in a similar manner, and lied down, "I believe in you Zwei!"

    "Arf!" Was Zwei's response as Ruby let herself fall asleep. He set to work soon, pulling out the weird slimy things from the top of the human's heads. They smelled weird, and one was somewhat smaller than the other. Being the good and smart boi that he is, Zwei managed to get the slimy things in the top of his humans. He went over to the lighter one and started to nuzzle her face aggressively.

    "Mmm... Yang... No... Five more minutes... Huh?" Ruby opened her eyes and sat up. She felt... different, "That's weird," she gasped after she heard her voice. Ruby didn't sound like Ruby. She looked down at her hands and noticed the white sleeves and frilly skirt. She smiled wide, "Success! Step one is complete! Now on to step two." It was odd to hear Weiss' voice speaking Ruby's words. But she didn't have time to marvel at that. She had places to be, as heiress to the Schnee Dust Company...

    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to @infinatedynamics on tumblr for this idea


	2. Along The Path

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now that Ruby has Weiss' body under her command, there's nothing that can keep her from her high-reaching Cookie goals!  
> (Mind/Body)

    Jaune was walking along when he noticed Weiss coming his way. He stopped in his tracks and started thinking about what he should say. He decided upon, like usual, a cheesy line. (Which I really wish he wouldn't do, but...)

    "Hi Jaune!" Weiss said cheerfully as she walked past Jaune. He was so shocked he didn't even get a chance to deliver his pickup line, he was so taken aback. 

    "She didn't seem  _unhappy_ to see me... seems like a win..."

    Ruby/Weiss kept on her way and noticed that Nora was messing around in a tree with what appeared to be a crossbow. "Nora..?"

    "Yes, Weiss?" Nora answered.

    _Weiss? Oh yeah..._ Ruby/Weiss furrowed her brow, "Whatcha doin' in that tree?" 

    "Well, it's real simple really. In the Emerald Forest, Pyrrha kept Jaune from splatting into the ground by pinning him to a tree with her spear."

    "Uh-huh..."

    "So, I'm gonna try to recreate that moment. I'm just waiting for Jaune to walk by unawares."

    "That!... Doesn't seem safe..." Ruby/Weiss started out cheerfully, but realized exactly what Nora was planning to do.

    "Eh... You wanna stick around and watch? Or is this simply  _too childish_ for you?" Nora mocked Weiss' idea of fun before giggling a little.

    Ruby/Weiss frowned at this accusation, "Well I saw Jaune going the other way, so I don't think he'll be coming by any time soon," she advised Nora, "Maybe you should try this with Ren instead? Seems less... lethal..."

    "Ooh! That's an idea! Thanks Weiss!" Nora smiled, before shouting, "REEEEENNN!"

    Ruby/Weiss was still a little thrown by being called Weiss, but she kept on her way.  _Right, I'm in Weiss' body, with Weiss' face and Weiss' voice and limbs. Need to be Weiss._ She focused on the world outside of her thoughts and noticed Pyrrha coming out of the library. She smiled wide for a second, before remembering who she was. She put on a straight face and held her head high, doing her best to look proper. She, instead, ended up looking a little like a drunk show pony.  _Darn heels..._

    Pyrrha smiled and greeted Ruby/Weiss, "Hello again!"

     _Play it cool._ "'Sup?"  _Too cool!_ "-Erm, hello Pyrrha! How are you today?" Ruby/Weiss recited in the most proper and polite tone she could think of.

     _Is something wrong? Did I make her mad somehow? What's with her tone?,_  Pyrrha thought."Oh, I'm doing alright. Did you happen to see where Jaune went? He left this in the library," Pyrrha was holding a piece of paper with Jaune's handwriting on it. 

     _Remember! You are Weiss._ "Oh Jaune? I don't know, I think I saw him earlier. He... departed...(?) somewhere in that direction," Ruby/Weiss pointed back along where she came from.

    Pyrrha thanked Ruby/Weiss and was soon on her way to Jaune. Lot of people wanted to see him that day, huh? 

    Ruby/Weiss watched Pyrrha leave before turning to find Blake coming her way.  _Can't catch a break!_

Blake looked up from her book, (How she read and walked safely at the same time is anyone's guess) "Hey Weiss. What's up?"

    Ruby/Weiss responded to her friend very friendly, "What's happening, my Fun Faunus Friend!" Too friendly...

    Blake squinted at Ruby/Weiss real hard. "What's that supposed to mean?"

    Ruby/Weiss realized exactly how those words sounded coming out of her mouth. She panicked, "Oh no! I didn't mean..! That wasn't supposed to..! What I meant to say..! Aah!" She sputtered, her nervous nature overcoming her confident facade, "I'm sorry..." 

    An awkward moment passed. Broken by Blake, "Alright. Imma just go..." She looked back down at her book and walked past Ruby/Weiss. Ruby/Weiss started walking again too.

     _HOW IN THE WORLD DID WE NOT GET CAUGHT JUST NOW?_ A voice in Ruby's head asked.

     _The Cookie Gods are on our side!_ was the first response her brain gave back to her.

    Ruby/Weiss finally arrived at the CCT buliding...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That (?) in Ruby/Weiss dialogue is to denote that neither she, nor I, was asking a question, but it was an upturn in her speech, as she was unaware of what words she should use.


	3. Phase Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruby/Weiss now has only to tell the Schnee Dust Company to begin production on a new type of Dust and her chocolate seeds will be sown!  
> But she forgot one important step in her process...   
> -  
> -  
> Bury the evidence!

    A call was coming in from Beacon Academy. The receptionist at the SDC picked up.

    "Oh! Miss Schnee! Hello! How are you today?"

    "Oh, I'm doing alright." Ruby/Weiss cheerfully replied.

    "And what are you calling about today?" The receptionist (let's say her name is Roja) asked.

    Ruby/Weiss smiled wide, "I am  _so_ glad you asked..."

* * *

    "I'm Yang Xiao Long. Just walking along. Singing my song, and nothing can go wrong!" Yang sang a jolly little tune as she was on her way to  ~~consume~~ the mess hall when she noticed her little sister, Ruby, sleeping under a tree, as Zwei napped in her lap. She approached. "Hey~" Yang cooed to the sleeping Ruby, trying to wake her gently, "You wanna go get some food with me? I hear they got snickerdoodles today..." 

    Weiss/Ruby did not respond.

    Yang gently shook her, "Hey sleepy head, you all right?" 

    Weiss/Ruby slowly opened her eyes, and looked at the pup resting on her lap. She gently smiled, "Hey Zwei... when did you get here?" As she began to pet him.

    "Ahem..." Yang made her presence known, as the person who woke Weiss/Ruby.

    "Oh! Hi Yang! What's up?"

    "Oh, nothing. Just going to the cafeteria and wanted to see if you want to come with me. Get some cookies and lemonade or something..." 

    Weiss/Ruby's face lit up at the prospect of having lunch with a friend, but fell back down in confusion, "Cookies and lemonade..? How old do you think I am? Twelve?"

    Yang scowled at her "sister", "Just because you're here a little younger than normal doesn't mean you have too grow up quicker or anything. You can still enjoy being a kid."

    Weiss/Ruby was  _really_ confused now, "What do you mean 'younger' I'm-" she stopped when she noticed what she was wearing.

    A black dress with red accents... and a red hood... "RUBY!!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one's a little short. But there wasn't very much that needed to happen here. Production on the next chapter will begin tomorrow afternoon!


	4. Whoops!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruby's just... havin' a tough day...

    “Look! It’s really not that difficult to understand! You make it so that it starts a crystal, or bullet, or volatile and literal Dust! AND IT COMES OUT! AS COOKIES!” Ruby/Weiss had a small vein pushing out on her forehead and her breathing was shallow.

    “Of course Miss Schnee,” Roja was sweating and barely able to keep a civil tone, “The part I am having difficulty with, is how that works. Cookies are not a force of nature! They are man-made and, quite frankly, not very battle effective!” She was starting to lose her resolve.

    "What do you mean, 'not battle effective'? Delicious gooey chocolate chip cookies are an incredible moral booster, and very important when yOuR'E FiGHTING A MONSTER THAT CAN VERY LITERALLY SMELL FEAR!" 

    "Miss Schnee," Roja started, matter-of-factly, "How would we even begin to produce such a type of Dust? It is completely unheard of, and the idea of it is extremely childish." Roja had collected herself and was speaking more calmly.

    "Well, isn't that why you guys have scientists?" Ruby/Weiss hadn't bothered herself with thinking about the actual logistics of how the Dust was going to work.

    "Scientists, Miss Schnee?"

    "Yeah! Those people that do research on the Dust, and-"

    A tap on her shoulder.

    "Yeah, just a sec- HEYyy, Yang! What's up?" Ruby/Weiss had looked up to find her sister glaring at her. 

    Not looking away or changing expression, Yang answered, "Oh just fine... Just great... Ruby's here with me."

    Yang stepped aside to reveal Weiss/Ruby standing behind her, grumpy as heck!

    "Hey Rubyy.... whatcha doin'?" Ruby/Weiss asked very innocently.

    "Cut the shit, Ruby." Weiss/Ruby growled. Her scold was met by gasps. Firstly because it was so shocking to hear Ruby's voice cuss, but also because there's no cussing around Ruby while Yang's there. She still liked to believe in Ruby's innocence.

    "Is that really what I sound like?" Ruby/Weiss asked.

    "Is that really what  _I_ sound like?" Weiss/Ruby mock-asked, hiding genuine surprise at the way her own voice fell on her new ears.

    "Is there a problem on your end, Miss Schnee?" Roja was still on the other end of the call. 

    "I'm... gonna have to call back later," Ruby/Weiss ended the call.

    She, then, proceeded to look directly into the camera, "We'll be right back, folks," she said as one of those Looney Tunes black circles closed around her face. 

    Sounds of mild fighting can be heard. Along with screams of "Stop!" "You bitch!" and "NOT THE HAIR! NOT THE HAIR!"

* * *

    Ruby, Weiss and Yang were all sitting under the apple tree again, Zwei in Yang's lap.

    "Well, I'm glad that's all sorted out." Yang chimed.

    "Yeah... I guess..." Ruby sighed.

    Just then, a UPS truck (but, like, Remnant's equivalent) pulled up, and a man stepped out with a medium-sized package. He spoke, "I have a special delivery from the Schnee Dust Company for Weiss Schnee." 

    Weiss stood up, "That's me." She signed for and took the package. She sat down to open it, "I wonder what's inside!? Maybe Winter sent me a gift!" Weiss torn the top off of the package, "....huh?"

    "What is it?" Ruby asked.

    Weiss pulled out a Dust crystal with an odd coloring, "Brown... with... darker brown? What in the-?" 

    Before she could get any other words out of her mouth, Ruby had snatched the Dust crystal from Weiss and was closely inspecting it. "They did it... By God, they really did it!" Ruby shouted, ecstatic.

    "Ruby what are you talking-?" But Yang was also interrupted by Ruby throwing the Dust up into the air and pulling out her trusty Crescent Rose. She took aim...  _BANG!_

Silence. The Dust crystal had exploded... but to nothing.

    "Aww. But... b-but..." Ruby stuttered.

    "Ruby, what's going on?" Weiss implored. "What was all that-"

    Then it happened. A single cookie fell right in front of Weiss' face. She looked to the sky with Yang and Ruby to see more on their way.

     _Thud. Thud thud. Thuthuthudthudthuthud._ More cookies fell from the sky as Ruby danced in joy!

    She grabbed a Cookie from the downpour and took a bite, "Ugh! Oatmeal raisin!?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it for this one! But this is a series, so I'm (hopefully) going to add more fics and misadventures into this universe where folks swap their brains! Maybe we see the villains get into on this hijinxious madness? Later though... for now, I rest...


End file.
